


Whatever Makes You Happy

by Garito



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-08
Updated: 2017-03-24
Packaged: 2018-02-20 10:30:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2425430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Garito/pseuds/Garito
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A normal but not so normal day at Misha's place.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm trying to write a Seb/Mish fanfiction for a change, but there will be Cockles in it for sure (;

His finger rushed over the screen of his smartphone, randomly opening folders and eventually his address book. He recognized then that he was bored and there always seemed to be only one way to get out of this. He chose the contact saved as 'Mishuhu' and the contact picture looked at him, smiling and - those way too blue eyes. Fans were right with writing about them, he thought before he plugged his headset in and closed the cover of his phone, replacing those blue eyes with an actual voice in his ear.  
“What's up?” Misha asked. It sounded like he was chewing on something.  
“Your having lunch?”  
“Breakfast actually, got up late.” Sebastian smiled amused by the thought that the other one was probably still in his pajamas.  
“I'm bored.” He responded and heard Misha chuckle.  
“Like so very often. Why don't you come over? I'm kind of alone today.”  
“What happened to your wife and kiddos? Did they finally ran?”  
There was a playful sulking in Mishas voice when he answered.  
“Not quite. They are at the zoo. And I have night shooting so I decided to stay even though I kind of regret it now because... y'know, boring.”  
“Well we might change that.”  
Sebastian grinned when he hung up. The day just had just taken a pleasing change.

In the front garden laid a yellow tricycle. Sebastian stopped in front of it and picked it up. It was unexpected light and he recognized the unmown grass under it. West probably forgot this here and nobody had recognize it yet. He wondered if he should bring it in when the front door opened and he looked up, still with this tricycle in his hand, oddly smiling.  
Misha looked at him, raising a brow skeptically.  
“Are you going to steal West's toys? I wouldn't make that effort, you're probably too big for this.”  
Sebastian chuckled and placed the tricycle next to the house wall before he got over to Misha and greeted him with a hug.  
“I was just inspecting your grass. Needs a haircut.”  
“Nonsense. This hair looks awesome, I see no reason to change anything.”  
Sebastian could feel Misha eying the grass over his shoulder and smiled. If it was on him he could look at his front garden for the next hour so they wouldn't end this hug. He could smell a fresh scent of shampoo, could feel the slightly wet strands of hair on his face and Mishas chest was pressed against his own while the younger one was on his toes to look over his shoulder. He could stay there forever, if it was on him.  
But Misha got back at his feet and looked at him questioning.  
“So... You wanna come in or do you want to hug me in this door forever?”  
“You know me too well.” he laughed softly and got into the house.

Misha turned on the television and Sebastian settled down on the couch.  
“Seriously, TV? I could have done that at home.”  
“But not with me.” Misha responded, falling on the couch next to him, immediately leaning on his shoulder.  
“Also, as I told you, I had shooting this night and that means I'm hella tired.”  
Sebastian smiled and moved his arm over Misha to place it on his back and pulled him closer so he was leaning against his chest. Misha had a point there, nothing spoke against watching a show with him in his arms.  
“I like your shampoo.” He said and Misha looked up at him shortly.  
“What a response.” He grinned, Sebastian grinned back and then they concentrated on the TV.  
The show was amusing but even more amusing were the ads when both of them were performing a never ending commentary to what they were watching.  
Sebastian had begun to caress Mishas arm with his fingers and the other one didn't seem to mind at all. He even moved slightly closer, enjoying the warmth and coziness of another body next to him.  
In the last bit of the show Sebastian recognized that Misha was drifting away. His breathe changed and he didn't respond to the show anymore, no chuckle, no tensed muscles because something was thrilling. He didn't mind though. There was something pleasant in a sleeping Misha in his arms. For example how one of his hands held on to his T-shirt or how he pushed his cheek against his chest for more comfort. Sebastian ran his fingers up to the younger ones neck only to receive a little shiver and a quiet moan from Misha. He smiled amused. Thank you night shifts. This was delicious.  
He continued drawing little circled with his fingers, running down his back, shifting to his sides. And all the time Mishas body was reacting, unconsciously in his sleep of course, but it did, and it drove him mad. If he didn't want to get hard he should stop right here.  
That was when Misha opened his eyes and for a moment Sebastian couldn't hide his shock about that. But he changed fast enough into a light grin and sleepy Misha didn't recognized. At least he hoped so.  
“That's nice...” the younger one said, in a rough voice, heavy from sleep. Great, give me one reason why I shouldn't lay you instantly now.  
“I figured.” He said instead, still smiling warmly and Misha gave that smile back.  
“You can continue.” He said then, eyes closing again and Sebastian signed.  
“Let me at least get us into a more comfortable position, okay?” He moved to to end of the couch, pulling Misha with him and stretched out his legs then. Now the other one was half laying on him, cuddled up to him and ready for any innocent caress there was. Sebastian shook his head slightly.  
“You're so spoiled, you know that?”  
And he started running his fingers over Mishas back again. The younger one didn't answer but Sebastian could swear he could feel Misha chuckle on his chest.

Sebastian awoke with a start when he heard a door closing. The TV was showing ads and a woman was just taking in a big spoon of yoghurt, Misha was still sleeping on his chest, muttering something unrecognizable in his sleep. Sebastian needed a second to take that all in and remember where he was. He must have been falling asleep himself and the next thing he saw was Vicki in the door looking at him confused, then grinning amused.  
“That's a funny picture to come home to. How are you Sebastian? I see you took good care of my husband.”  
Sebastian chuckled. If it wasn't Vicki the situation would have been awkward but it was Vicki, so there was nothing to worry about.  
“Yeah, I think his night shifts are not doing him good”  
He got a honest laughter from the woman in front of him and shifted a bit, trying to rub his eyes without waking up Misha. It must be already late afternoon if Vicki was back home.  
“We were watching TV, I guess we fell asleep, both of us.”  
“That's because TV is boring most of the time.” She winked and was already about to go to the kitchen but before she left the room she asked Sebastian if he'd want a coffee, what he happily agreed on.

It appeared to be complicated to get away from Misha, because the younger one was clinging on to him as soon as Sebastian started moving. It gave him a funny feeling to know that Vicki was waiting for him in the kitchen while Misha was pressing his thighs around his legs and grasping his shoulder to make him stay. He made out a mumble that sounded like 'Don't go' and smiled, uninvited touched by the other ones behavior. Certainly Misha was just sleepy and would probably reconsider his behavior if he was awake, but Sebastian allowed himself to enjoy the other ones attachment, his warm and red cheek, now brought up closer to his own face and the heavy breathing noises. Maybe, if he was fast, he might even steal a kiss without getting recognized by anyone. He leaned in to take his chance when in the same second, Misha opened his eyes and Vicki came into the room to ask him if he'd want sugar in his coffee.  
Well, this was awkward now. But then Vicki raised a brow and said jokingly:  
“Did you kiss the princess awake?” And Sebastian let out his breathe he was holding, relieved and once again amazed by that womans calmness.  
Misha just blinked at him, oblivious, no idea about what was going on, before he turned to Vicki as if he wouldn't just be glommed on to somebody else and said:  
“You're back already? It must be super late!”  
Sebastian couldn't believe those too. 

They had coffee in the kitchen while Misha was in the bathroom to get presentable for work.  
“I wasn't kissing him” he reassured, zipping his coffee and watching Vicki over his cup.  
“But you were about to.” Her eyes scared him sometimes, what he wouldn't admit, but in moments like this she gave him the feeling that he didn't have a chance to lie. Then she started smiling and he just smiled back, feeling stupidly boyish.  
“He's sweet when he's sleeping.” Vicki said as if she was talking about a pet and not about her husband who was about to be kissed by another man.  
“But only then.” Sebastian joked and she joined in laughing and sat down with her own cup of coffee.  
“So tell me about it.” Oh well, that sounded more serious.  
“Does he make you hot?”  
He could feel the blood rushing into his cheeks immediately and it felt like minutes when he just stared at Vicki who observed him more interested than anything else.  
“Does he...”  
“Do I what?” Misha reached for an empty cup on the table and let himself fall in a chair next to Vicki.  
“Huh?”  
Vicki chuckled because now even she could feel the awkwardness of the situation.  
“Wasn't about you Misha, it's not always about you.” And Sebastian could see her wink at him while Misha gave back some sulking comments.  
He still wasn't sure what kind of talk he just had, or almost had had.

It didn't come up again and Sebastian left with Misha when he went off for work.  
They said their goodbyes and he couldn't recognize any negative feeling coming from Vicki, what confused him in a way but relieved him even more. He didn't want her being angry with him, because you just don't want this woman being angry with you.  
Sebastian was so heavily in thoughts that he didn't recognize that Misha wasn't saying a word until the other one snapped him out of his thoughts.  
“Where you going to kiss me in there?” he asked and there was a seriousness in his voice that Sebastian didn't know on him. Though maybe that was acted and actually he was about to burst out in laughter every second.  
“Why would I?” He asked back, playing it skeptical and Misha grinned at him.  
“Yeah, why would you, silly me.”  
Did that sound like he'd actually prefer it the other way around? Sebastian tried to give him a questioning look but Misha wasn't looking at him.  
“Don't sound like nobody would like to kiss you, I bet there are a billion people eagerly kissing there cardboard Castiels right in this very second.”  
That made him chuckle and he looked up at him, stopped and suddenly wrapped his arms around Sebastians neck.  
“And you didn't want to kiss me?” he asked again and for a moment, Sebastian fell for his trick and leaned in closer, ready to finish what he'd started on the couch. But he could see the start of a grin on the other ones lips and stopped in the very last second, grinning himself.  
“No way Mishu. No.”  
If he didn't know it better, he'd swear there was disappointment in those blue eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's too easy to spend too much time with Misha

“Goodnight Misha.”  
He hung up, wondering if the other one was aware of the softness in his voice when he said his name. Sebastian would like to change that but it happened unconsciously and he could do nothing against it. He let his phone down next to himself in the bed and looked at the ceiling.   
It was a cold day but his room was nicely warm and cozy. He just wished he wouldn't be alone.   
Misha had told him about a prank Jensen and Jared had played on him and it didn't slip his attention that Misha had the same softness in his voice when heA was talking about Jensen. That was something he was used to by now, but sometimes it still occurred to him as ironic.   
There was a perfectly clear image in his mind when he repeated the moment when Misha was telling him about the other actor. He could picture his smile, not fitting to the mean story he was telling. He could see his eyes brighten up, talking about Jensens stupid grin. In comparison he talked about Jared as if he was just the secondary character in the story, there was no change of voice when he said Jareds name, there was no teenager laugh when he told him that he drove him crazy.   
Too bad that the younger one would never have a chance there, he would not begrudge him that.   
Sebastian sighed loudly. Nobody was here to hear him.   
Then he turned to his side and tried to get some sleep.

The next morning he awoke to a text from Misha, asking him to join him for groceries.   
Your kidding, he thought, even though he was smiling amused. His watch said 1pm. Oh well... He got up and had a quick shower before he texted Misha back. They met an hour later in front of the supermarket.  
“You know that it's a strange thing to ask someone out for grocery shopping, right?”  
Misha gave him an innocent look.   
“Not at all. Nowadays it's so hard to keep your social contacts next to your everyday routine. You need to be creative.”  
Sebastian chuckled.  
“Lucky you, that I had some things to buy in mind as well.”   
And even if that wasn't the case he'd have followed the request. But that was nothing Misha had to know.  
Sebastian recognized how he noted all the things Misha picked in the shop in a secret list in his mind of things Misha liked. That wasn't really a hundred percent sure thing because he could also pick those for Vicki or the kids but who knew what might be useful one day.  
He shook his head about this senseless action but it didn't change anything.  
They went out, Misha with two big bags and Sebastian with a few things in a light plastic bag.  
“Give me one of those.” He said when they stood in front of each other to say goodbye. Because Misha looked so amusing with those bags in each hand and not even able to hug him properly, that Sebastian forgot about going home.  
“You don't have to, seriously.” Misha defended himself but in the same second he was already handing him one of the bags and Sebastian laughed about the inconsistency.  
“Sure.” he commented and then he walked him home.

For some reason he stopped in front of a flower shop on his way back. His dad had loved roses, even though he never had bought them because he couldn't bare their beauty in the surrounding of the everyday life.  
He picked one up and thought about Misha, talking to a group of fans about how art and beauty could be found everywhere. How a single act of kindness can change a persons life.   
He was representing beauty, and it would be such a waste to store him in a flower shop or water him in a garden. He went in to buy this rose.

On another day they went out with with West and Maison to give Vicki some time to work on an article. The playground was crowded and Misha was holding Maison to climb up a ladder, Sebastian leaning against the play house. West was involved in a catch game of a group of children and they got into talking about third parts in Misha and Vicki's relationships.   
“We eventually stopped after West was born though.” Misha said, after an excursion about former partners. Sebastian nodded understanding, knowing that already.   
“And what happens if the perfect third appears suddenly?”  
Misha chuckled and shrugged.  
“Didn't happen yet, but no one said we couldn't change our minds. Whoops.”  
Maison was reaching the top of the ladder and Misha was almost not able to hold her anymore.  
“You better come down here.. Start again.”  
And the little one was eagerly starting to climb up again.  
Misha gave Sebastian an inquiringly look, coming back to the theme.   
“Why were you asking?”  
“Curiosity, what did you think?”  
“Well... Who knows.” There was a teasing tone in his voice and Sebastian didn't like the sound of that. But he wasn't sure how to get out of this so he just shrugged uncomfortable and looked at Maison instead.   
“Your daddy is making conclusions without any reason once again, huh?” He got a 'Da, Da' as an answer.

He could see the rose in a vase on his table in the corner of his eye while he was slowly letting his fingers run down his body, moving straight towards his pants. There was just too much Misha in the last days to let him sleep calmly. He was just too alone in this bed to fall asleep easily. He was thinking about the brief moment they shared when a fan stopped them today to make a picture with both of them. How it felt like to have his arm around his waist and how he wished he could just pull him around, kiss him hard and take him against the next best wall. Even in public, if given. It didn't matter much, where this was placed, it was just something that was long needed to be done and Sebastian ached to at least give his thoughts the freedom to exist.   
He was rough with himself, feeling a kind of anger rising, that he didn't know of before.   
He could feel that he was annoyed by himself.  
For adoring the most simple aspects like a silent laughter or a puzzled gaze. How it made him smile when he got a textmessage from Misha and how he was always saying yes, no matter how stupid the idea was.  
He could feel that he felt sorry for himself.  
For being in no position to ask for anything. For being alone. For wanting something he couldn't have.  
He thought that he shouldn't allow himself to have those feelings.  
But he thought that he had any right to have this orgasm, and that was what kept him going.  
When he came it was short and unsatisfying.  
He closed his eyes, to get rid of the chaos in his head, to get back to the positive mask he was making himself believe every day. But all he ended up with was Misha's face and him asking “Why were you asking?”.

He woke up having a little cold. He had tea in his kitchen and decided that this was the prefect timing for the usual no-Misha time. This happened once in a while, when he felt like it just became too much to him and he needed a break, or everything would get worse.  
He could need some time for himself, meet some friends, get some different thoughts.  
It was a systematic forgetting about this one guy, and he was used to doing it from time to time. Nothing special. For Misha it'd just look like he'd be short in time and he had never questioned anything.  
Training in the gym was perfect, when he just concentrated on the exercise and blanked out everything else. He was spending two hours a day there the whole week.  
In the evenings he hit the bars, started conversations with strangers, preferably woman, or met some acquaintances he hadn't seen in a while. It felt good to clear his mind and he started sleeping better again.  
He received a message from Misha on Tuesday which he ignored for an hour and then told him that he wouldn't have time today, that, in fact, he was pretty busy this week.  
Misha made no trouble, fortunately.

On Wednesday he felt almost like his old self again and he liked the feeling of being back in control.  
He was glad he'd decided for this little time out.  
He spent Thursday night with a woman. Her name was Eileen and she had lost her husband a year ago. Sebastian had talked to her several times before because she seemed to return to the same bar he usually went in. Her hair was dark and her eyes even darker and he enjoyed talking with her even though she had this sad touch to her stories and he knew that she was only there to drink away the pain. But he could make her laugh, mostly and she enjoyed his stories about his job because her only son just started to study direction this year.   
This day he finally asked her if she'd want to spend the rest of the night at his place.   
They talked a lot, as if this was natural between them and had another two or three glasses of red wine. Sebastian didn't know if this was supposed to become something serious, but he was taking the risk.  
He kissed her carefully, because with all he knew, she was a fragile person. She responded this kiss, and many others and he got what he longed for eventually.

The next morning she was flustered and unsettled.  
He tried to calm her down, telling her, that she didn't have to feel engaged in anything but that seemed to upset her even more.  
“It's just too early for something new.” she told him, while she got dressed and he could make out tears in her eyes. He felt the urge to talk her into staying for breakfast, to make it better, but for some reason he didn't. Most likely this girl just wasn't important enough to him.  
None the less he felt sorry for her when she left and wondered if he would ever see her again.

When Misha called him on Friday he took the call without hesitation.   
“Right here.”  
“Heyya. How are things?”  
“Good I'd say, anything up?”  
It felt good to hear his voice but it felt even better to not be absolutely controlled by that feeling.  
“Ya, actually there is something. We were wondering if you'd like to come over for coffee this weekend.”  
There was a strange tone to his words and Sebastian wasn't sure if he should question it.  
“Coffee, well, sounds not bad...” he said hesitantly.   
“Good!” Misha said immediately and Sebastian got the feeling that he had been part of a bet or something.  
“Anything weird you want to tell me?” He couldn't help himself asking.  
“Naah. You'll see. Let's say tomorrow 3 pm.” and then he just hung up.  
Sebastian looked at his phone and already regretted that he'd said yes so easily.  
Whatever Misha and Vicki were up to, he didn't know if he'd want to know.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki and Misha have a crazy idea and Sebastian decides to go through with it.

Sebastian was stunned he found himself in this situation right now.  
He was kissing the crook of Vickies neck while Misha was running his fingers down his body from behind. It was hard to concentrate. Now and then he was still wondering if he'd made a mistake to agree to this ridiculous idea, but he'd learned it was best to forget about this thought.  
He actually liked to touch the bare skin of the woman in front of him. He let his fingers run carefully over her breast, while he couldn't prevent a shiver, reacting to Mishas lips on his shoulders. It was in all ways unbelievable that this was happening but he couldn't say that it didn't turn him on.  
Vicki was moving closer, now kissing his shoulder from the other side, while Sebastian closed his hands around her waist and started moving them up her sides, still overcarefully gentle.  
He could feel the other man shifting closer as well, could feel his legs on his back, more importantly his growing boner and then they started kissing over his shoulder, what in a strange way made him feel more comfortable and he grabbed Vickies ass to press her against his own erection.  
He could her her moan into the kiss.

A few weeks ago they've had the talk. Sebastian remembered it perfectly.  
Coming into the house, already knowing that this would be a weird afternoon. And being right with that, because for some reason Vicki and Misha had talked about him and figured, that it would do each of them a favor if they'd try it together.  
He hadn't been sure how to react to this.  
The most active emotion was fear. Fear that he'd revealed to much about what he was feeling for Misha, fear, that it would be different between them now.  
It sure got different. But in a way he'd never imagined.  
He remembered Vicki saying that it was obvious to them, that he had a thing for Misha and that she was wondering if he could have a thing for her too. He remembered them stating, that whatever happened, the number one rule was, that he was not to come between them.  
All those words were more likely words to him than reality. But he tried to forget about the weirdness, because the last thing he wanted to do, was to spoil the fun. And they were right, there was an enormous chance for him, to get something out of it as well.  
Vicki wasn't unattractive to him, he'd just never thought about it. That he would never come between them was for sure, he didn't even think about trying. That they were so fine with him having 'a thing' for Misha, was confusing, but good in a way. No hiding then.  
This were logical thoughts and while he was thinking those he probably stared at Vicki and Misha absolutely confused until Misha chuckled.  
“Okay, look, I think we are overwhelming you here. Maybe it would be best you think about it first.”  
Sebastian looked at him, trying to find an answer to a question he wasn't sure of himself and then he finally kicked his confusion over board and answered quite calm:  
“No, actually, I think it's a fantastic idea. I mean, crazy, but what isn't crazy about you two. So how did you imagine this to look like?”  
He was happy to have the ability to just live in the moment if he wanted and forget about any doubts or possible complications.  
“I suppose you wanna start slow?” It was Vicki speaking.  
“Why don't you stay the night and we share the bed. Nothing has to happen just... you know” she smiled and Sebastian recognized a playful shyness in her smile.  
“To get to know each other.”  
The three of them chuckled amused by that comment and it felt like part of the ice was broken already.

They spend the evening together, doing not much more than usually even though Sebastian could feel a new essence to their behavior towards each other. He recognized Vicki giving him looks she didn't give him before, he could see Misha smiling at him reassuring, almost inviting. And even the both of them together seemed more relaxed in there sexual vibes between them.  
They decided that he'd have to sleep between them so he wouldn't feel left out. It was late and Vicki had them all drink a lot of wine before they went to bed and all in all Sebastian felt relaxed, even a bit amused to have those two cuddled up to him now from either side.  
“I must say it feels a bit like I'd be your daddy and I'm inclined to kiss you two goodnight.”  
He could feel Vicki chuckle and Misha looking up.  
“Well maybe you do.” he said then and Sebastian looked down at him, his heart suddenly beating faster.  
“Yeah right.” Vicki reassured and he felt like now he couldn't take it back.  
He leaned down giving Misha a short kiss on the lips, ignoring the happy tickle it gave him to do so and then changed sides to do the same to Vicki.  
What he didn't expect was, that Vicki didn't let him go with a short one but held his head and pulled him into a deeper kiss, in which he joined in after a moment of confusion.  
“Just to erase your feeling of being our daddy, you know.” she said afterwards and he could feel her grin. He just looked at her stunned. Then Misha poked his finger in his side and complained playfully.  
“Not fair, you know!”  
Sebastian couldn't suppress a laughter.  
“You're still behaving like the child.” He said, before he turned back and happily gave Misha what he'd asked for.  
The two of them fell asleep long before Sebastian did. Their hands were intertwined on his chest and he stared at the ceiling above him, listened to their breathing and took in there slight movements and warmth.  
He still wasn't sure if it had been the right decision but right now, he pretty much liked the perspective.

Another good thing was, that they were meeting more frequently. And those times felt much more easy going because there was no need in hiding his attraction anymore. He got totally comfortable with stopping for a short hug or kiss while passing either of them, when he was at their place. It were the little things and Sebastian was sure it was Vicki who initiated to include them in their everyday life when they were together, to make him feel comfortable.  
It was Misha though who did it first, passing him in the kitchen but stopped to cuddle up from behind. Sebastian instinctively froze in that moment, but calmed down in seconds reminding himself that this was the new normal right now.  
“What's up with you?” he asked teasingly and turned around.  
“Nothing. Just... ” They looked at each other for a moment, Sebastian wasn't sure if Misha was going to continue his sentence. But that didn't happen and when it started to get awkward he ended the staring with letting their lips meet and the moment Misha gave in in that kiss was something he'd always remember, as little as it was. 

The second night they spent together was more intense. Being comfortable with kissing and light-touches they started discovering the other bodies, part by part. Sebastian felt saver starting with Vicki, even though it was weird to know Misha was in the same bed. But he didn't want her to feel that he was using this to only nail her husband so it happened naturally that his hands started moving over her body first. She seemed to enjoy it and he continued for a while, before he shoved his fingers under her shirt. He couldn't reach much more than parts of her back before Misha recognized the situation and shifted away from him a little.  
“You don't..?”  
“I don't mind at all. I'll watch.” he answered, in low voice. And Sebastian decided that it was the best not to argue. He turned to his side, the other arm free now and started opening Vickies pyjama shirt. He made place for Misha to watch what he was doing, even if it felt quite strange to be watched. He drew lines with his fingers, over her upper body, leaned closer to repeat with his lips, carefully sucking her nipples finally.  
Vicki was shifting under him with pleasure and when he looked up a second to meet Misha's eyes, he got excited by the turned on gaze he was given.  
He slipped down, removed her trousers in the movement and continued setting kisses and little licks with his tongue on her body until he'd reached the insides of her thighs. He stopped there to have a look at Misha but that made Vicki express an impatient noise and Misha chuckle. Sebastian shook his head, barely noticeable and finished what he'd started.

It didn't took long after her orgasm, that Misha was on Sebastian, pulling him back on his back.  
“My turn.” he said, and sounded like a impatient boy again, but Sebastian didn't mind at all. He let Misha help him out of his clothes and Vicki kiss him while Misha was heading down for his cock.  
He was now definitely aroused enough to completely let go of his thoughts and to give in in enjoying what Misha was doing to him. Vicki had moved over to Misha to take care of his erection and Sebastian couldn't care less, feeling Mishas fingers pressing against his inner thighs and him taking him in, first slowly and then with more and more determination, leading him straight to the edge.  
He was aware enough though to not say anybodies name, because he figured that would be weird.  
Misha was coming not much later and he was holding on to Sebastians legs while he did so. The older one stopped breathing for the moment, just listening to Mishas moans and pulled him on his chest afterwards.  
They didn't speak then. Vicki cuddled up behind Misha and all three of them fell asleep by the sound of their breathing. 

And now they were here. And Sebastian was absolutely sure that they would go through with it today. He moved to the side, letting Misha and Vicki continue their kiss and Misha took his place in holding Vicki, running his hands over her body while their tongues were intertwined.  
Sebastian shifted behind Misha running his tongue over his spine, down to his ass. Misha gasped, interrupting his kiss and pressed Vickie down into the bed, leaving Sebastian with a perfect view of his ass. The older one couldn't believe that he was about to get what he was fantasizing about for so long now. He threw a few circles around Mishas entry with the tip of his tongue and he could see how it distracted Misha, from kissing Vicki.  
The younger one shifted a bit to suck on Vickies breast and neck to leave little love bruises and Sebastian leaned over to the nightstand to grab the lube.  
Misha didn't seem to notice it because when Sebastian used his finger to spread a good bit on Mishas hole he winced because of the cold liquid. He turned his head to look at Sebastian and his face was heated and his eyes full of want. Sebastian held his gaze when he inserted a finger into him and they stared at each other for a moment, barely breathing, before Misha turned back to Vicki, spreading her legs apart. Sebastian lubricated his dick while Misha was giving Vicki another deep kiss. He waited for Misha to get into Vicki before he followed. The room was full of moans and sweat. Vickies hands were brushing his as the both of them were holding on to Mishas upper body now.  
It was strange to move as three. But it didn't need long to get used to it.  
They came almost simultaneously, loud and satisfied and fell back on the bed, next to each other, facing the ceiling.  
They were breathing noisy, not talking for the moment until Misha voiced still breathless:  
“That was amazing.” , what made Sebastian and Vicki chuckle. Vicki placed her head on Mishas chest and Sebastian managed to bring his arm under the younger ones head.  
He had a few affectionate thoughts and the urge to voice them but he knew better. Instead he just ran his finger through the younger ones hair and placed a silent kiss on his temples hoping this would give him an idea how precious he was to him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Misha is leaving for set and Sebastian realises something.

Having Misha was an addiction. He wouldn’t admit it but he was in rapture and normally he’d have seen the signs and stopped spending his time with the younger one. But this time there was nothing holding him back, because he was allowed living his secret wishes which came along with giving in to his Misha-addiction. He was allowed to shush him with a kiss, when Misha went too far in explanation. No one would judge him for laying his arms around his waist and whisper dirty things in his ear. (Actually nobody ever judged him for that but it had a different kind of feeling towards it now.)   
He was regularly helping him out of his clothes – Starting at the kitchen table after they had dinner together and he and Vicki enlarged upon the fact, that their favorite dessert was definitely Misha, to another day when Vicki happened to be longing, and for some reason came to him for that and Misha joined in after no time, to that evening when Misha suddenly decided that they could just as well take a shower together now, what appeared to be a lot of fun – three people in a shower, but he got to help Misha out of his clothes, what was the important part.  
Sebastian lived in the moment, jumping from one high into the other and mostly he just didn't think about the weird situation they were in.

Misha didn't do anything in particular to put a stop to it. He'd agreed on the whole thing and now he lived it. No boundaries really, almost everything was possible. But even though Sebastian could tell, that Misha was enjoying the time they spent together, the jokes, the sex, he couldn't help worrying that this whole relationship wasn't going where it should go.  
It wasn't growing. It was like taking the same drug again and again and at some point it stops to take hold and you can't overlook the truth anymore. 

It was a Wednesday evening and they happened to be alone. Vicki and the kids had left in the afternoon to visit her parents and Misha hadn't joined them because he would fly to Vancouver in the morning.   
Sebastian was quiet most of the time. He had known that Misha was going to go back to set one day but he had always put that thought aside for the last weeks, enjoying the moment. Now it was painfully close. Even Vicki had recognized, what ended in a kind of awkward conversation about how she misses him a lot while he is shooting but how it also was good to get rid of him from time to time.  
Sebastian still admired her for being so totally fine with sharing her husband - body and emotions.  
"You gonna tell me what's on your mind?"  
Sebastian tried a smile. "Rien." He said, french for 'nothing', but Misha just chuckled and shook his head. "Come on. I don't believe you."  
He walked to Sebastian, who was leaning with his back against the kitchen counter.   
He could feel his body heating up when Misha laid his arms around his neck and came so close he could feel him breathe. He should have been used to this by now but it seemed like he always forgot about it again only to find himself being nervous or stunned with moments like this.  
"If I promise you a kiss, will you tell me?" The dark-haired grinned and Sebastian chuckled amused. He lowered his voice, being slightly uncomfortable with telling the truth.  
"I guess I'll gonna miss ya. That's all." Misha's eyes changed from daring to serious and Sebastian was startled by the depth in the younger ones expression. He cared. And maybe he only realized now, that this wasn't just a fun game to Sebastian.   
He found himself running his fingers along Misha's neck, pulling him closer now softly.   
Misha let him kiss him at his kitchen counter, holding on to his shirt then grapping his shoulder with the other hand. Sebastian deepened the kiss, intending to not let this moment pass so fast.  
This was actually the first time they had been alone.  
Of course there had been moments when Vicki hadn't been there, but only brief ones. Soft kisses, sweet jokes, cuddling on the couch. But this time they would spend the night together and probably they wouldn't just sleep.  
"You're done packing?" Sebastian asked, leaning over to place the words against Misha's neck, complementing them with soft kisses in between. He could feel the other one shiver slightly and then something that might have been a nod. "Don't think I got everything though, you know, me and packing." Sebastian chuckled and ran his fingers down Misha's arms until he found his hands. "Let's change location then." he said with an asking smile.  
Sebastian's muscles flexed when he had Misha bending back under him. He stopped in his  
movement, to hear the other one breathe in and out, the only noise in the sticky, heated-up room. He continued, in slow movements now, soaking in the feeling of Misha's fingertips pressed into his arms. The taste of sweat on his skin, the deep tone of his voice when he got in deep. All of it spun around in his head, like a storm of unfiltered impressions and he just didn't want it to stop.  
He found Misha's lips and kissed him in a sequence of moves, what left the other one breathless and the noise he was making while gasping for air sent him almost over the edge.   
Misha was looking at him now, probably because he stopped moving again and Sebastian leaned in for another kiss, hardly able to breathe himself.   
Until this point it had been a well trained procedure. A series of kissing and touching, the moment when you enter carefully, the change between slow and speeding up.  
He'd been afraid of this, them being alone. Because it was a whole different level than being together with the all-time supportive Vicki. Having sex, with him only, meant both of them had to be fully there. And now that Misha was looking at him, his hair messier than ever, red lips slightly parted and those questioning eyes, he couldn't stop the switch from flipping. Suddenly he wasn't an empty sheet anymore, soaking in impressions to remember them later when he was ready to feel them. Suddenly it was all there. There first hello on set and the immediate sympathy between them. The endless days of text messages with no real purpose except of texting. The days at bars or in the gym to forget about this blue-eyed guy for a week or two. And also countless little touches, smiles, laughs and his naked skin under his fingers in the shower, the taste of his back while he was inside of his wife, the sound of him..   
"Sebastian?" He blinked, feeling overwhelmed with the situation but couldn't possible find words for it. Instead he kissed him slowly, searching for the other ones tongue while slowly finding back to his rhythm. He could feel how Misha wanted to say something but he didn't let him, continued the kiss instead and moved less calculated now. All he could think about was how much he loved this man under him and suddenly it felt like this thought wasn't only in his head but in his fingers, in his lips, in every movement of his body. 

Misha held on to him tightly when he came, moaning close to Sebastian's ear and trying to find hold on his sweaty shoulder plades. Sebastian followed shortly after, Misha having his orgasm got him off completely. He sank down on the other one, breathing heavily and listened to his heart pounding fast and loud.   
They stayed silent for a moment, until Sebastian moved to Misha's side, cautiously, so he wouldn't hurt him. The younger one cuddled up to him and Sebastian had to lift his head a bit so Misha's hair wouldn't tickle his nose.   
He had the strong urge to tell him that he loved him.   
Suddenly it was very clear what he was trying to ignore all the time. This wasn't what he'd wanted. He wanted Misha, of course. But there was more to it, than having the right to get into his pants. There was more to it, than seeing him every day of the week.   
It was the way Misha was looking at his wife when she was playing with the children. The goodbye kisses when she was leaving the house. It was those three words he sometimes overheard him saying to her.   
This was what he craved for. And he wasn't getting this with being a third part in their already perfect relationship.   
Also this, the sex they'd just had. He wanted that. All the time. Being able to give him all, being able to show him what he felt. Not once, with Vicki, had it been this way. He admired her for sharing her husband, because he knew he couldn't.   
Misha was the one who spoke first. "Are you alright?" he asked.   
Sebastian ran his fingers over his back.  
"I am." he lied, closing his eyes and gulped back his tears.  
This would have to stop. 

So he announced it a week later on the phone. "I think we should stop the relationship-thingy and go back to the friendship-thingy, actually." "You do?" Misha sounded concerned what Sebastian had expected. "I just think it's not my thing. Was nice to try, though." He managed to sound casually and after a few seconds of silence Misha made an approving sound on the other end of the line. "I guess it's good you're honest about that."  
"I just hope nothing changes between us.."  
"'course not! Oh wait..."   
And then he was off the phone talking to somebody else but Sebastian couldn't make out a voice or words. He leaned back on his sofa and studied the ceiling. He hadn't expected a fight about this, even though he might have wished for one. Because if Misha would have tried to change his mind he'd have had the feeling, that this actually meant something to him. But the way Misha had agreed almost immediately showed Sebastian, that he had made the right call. He couldn't continue having sex with the man he was so dearly in love with, without being loved back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it goes, another chapter after ages..! But I didn't forget the fic and I hope I'll find time to continue more regularly now. Thanks for everyone who left kudos so far and reminded me that this still excists!  
> There's loads to come actually and maaaybe I'll even add a chapeter or two in other POV's. Not sure yet - but be expectant! :3


End file.
